(Recently conducted, after lugging a 40-pound bag of cat litter into the shopping cart.)
HIM: Maybe we should toilet train the cats.
ME: No, we don’t want to do that.
KID: That’s silly, Daddy!
HIM: Why not?
ME: You don’t want those cats toilet-trained.
HIM: Okay, tell me why.
ME: Because, if they truly exist to make your life miserable as you tell me so often, as soon as they see you heading for the bathroom they’ll sprint into the room, slamming the door behind them, and just sit there for a good half-hour, whether they have to use the toilet or not.
HIM: We have three bathrooms; and there’s only two of them.
ME: I don’t know how, but gut instinct tells me that they’ll find a way to render them all useless right when you need one the most.
HIM: You’re probably right.